Appreciation

Tonight I'm longing for change. I have to be honest...I'm not who I want to be, I'm not where I want to be, and I know there's hard work ahead.

I'm heading to the ocean tomorrow with one of my dearest friends. I have a few friends who God has given to me to walk through this life with. Each one is unique. Each one is drastically different than the other. And I love each one with all of my heart because I consider them priceless treasures.

I'm going to Lincoln City, to a small hotel called The Overlook. I think I've gone there for over 12 years.

I remember going there as a single woman, dreaming of and longing for the love of my life. I recall staying there before my second trip to Africa as I considered different paths my life might take. And I also cherish the memory of being there when I was pregnant with an absolute miracle baby, celebrating 5 years of marriage (and trying to have fun regardless of the constant nausea I was plagued with).

Tomorrow when I arrive with my dear friend, I know I will look out at the familiar scene and wonder. I will wonder at the beauty, expanse and fierceness of the ocean...which all points to an incredible Creator. The Creator of this world. The Creator of me. The One who knows me intimately. The only One who fashioned me and knows every day that is ordained for me.

Once an aspiring young minister told me, "It's not the destination that's important, it is all about the journey."

But now I realize that sometimes you have to reach your destination before you fully appreciate the journey.

I want to fully appreciate my journey. But I also know I'm not at my destination yet. So I'll keep my eyes on the horizon...and I'll come back refreshed and ready for some hard work.